I finally got everything off my chest which is great because I fell a little bit lighter. On the down side, I realiesed that I write better when I am in a depressive state. Music comes so much easier in that state of mind.
Over the weekend, I tried to complete another track started several weeks back and all I had was a blank.
Total frustration!!!! You feel happy and yet pissed off. Sigh, I guess that is what being alive is about. Now I have to learn how to evoke depressiveness and melancholy or alternatively keep doing things that will depress the hell of out me.
But how do you do something that would depress yourself? I think its near impossible, for me at least!!!
But I will write, I will continue to compose and I will succeed. I wish I will never fall in love, like really in love, because that will make me really happy and will definitely kill my inspiring requirements.
What the hell am I saying? Of course I want to fall in love. All I have to then is just turn ‘pop’!!!
Groan, If i ever turn pop, I will have to kill myself!!! Hey!!! now thats actually quite depressing!!! Hmmmm, this might work........
Monday, 21 January 2008
Monday, 14 January 2008
Untitled
All it wanted was for the truth to be heard,
A pillar doesn’t move even if it’s not rewarded,
Care and love does not change with answers,
It feeds on the fact that you’ll find happiness,
No, I won’t ask for more and
No, I won’t demand,
How can it be mad if all there is to give?
Time might change perception but stones,
Eventually decay will destroy us, proudly
Standing in the shadows, quietly
Giving and not requesting
No, I won’t ask for more and
No, I won’t demand
How can it be mad if all there is to give?
There is no nothing, just the way you think,
There is always something, just keep looking,
Till that time, It stands, Till that time
A pillar doesn’t move even if it’s not rewarded,
Care and love does not change with answers,
It feeds on the fact that you’ll find happiness,
No, I won’t ask for more and
No, I won’t demand,
How can it be mad if all there is to give?
Time might change perception but stones,
Eventually decay will destroy us, proudly
Standing in the shadows, quietly
Giving and not requesting
No, I won’t ask for more and
No, I won’t demand
How can it be mad if all there is to give?
There is no nothing, just the way you think,
There is always something, just keep looking,
Till that time, It stands, Till that time
Monday, 7 January 2008
The Doors
Opening and closing doors is a delicate business. Sometimes it’s just plain impossible to know what is behind the doors.
Holding a door open is delicate too. Hold too long and you never know what may get in or get out. Keeping one closed too long and the world may past you by.
Finding the balance between the two is an elusive art and unfortunately it only comes with experience. I regret keeping too many a door closed and regret opening some but that is fine because I start learning the right time to open & close.
Sometimes eternity is not a long time but there are times 14 days are a lifetime.
Holding a door open is delicate too. Hold too long and you never know what may get in or get out. Keeping one closed too long and the world may past you by.
Finding the balance between the two is an elusive art and unfortunately it only comes with experience. I regret keeping too many a door closed and regret opening some but that is fine because I start learning the right time to open & close.
Sometimes eternity is not a long time but there are times 14 days are a lifetime.
Wednesday, 2 January 2008
Tangan Lambat
Wow i wish i could write lyrics this cryptic. Interpol is fast becoming my number 1 band.
"Slow Hands"
Yeah but nobody searches
Nobody cares somehow
When the loving that you've wasted
Comes raining from a hapless cloud
And I might stop and look upon your face
Disappear in the sweet, sweet gaze
See the living that surrounds me
Dissipate in a violet place
Can't you see what you've done to my heart and soul?
This is a wasteland now
We spies
We slow hands
Put the weights all around yourself
We spies
Oh yeah we slow hands
You put the weights all around yourself now
I submit my incentive is romance
I watched the pole dance of the stars
We rejoice because the hurting is so painless
From the distance of passing cars
But I am married to your charms & grace
I just go crazy like the good old days
You make me want to pick up a guitar
And celebrate the myriad ways that I love you
Can you see what you've done to my heart and soul?
This is a wasteland now
We spies
Yeah we slow hands
You put the weights all around yourself
We spiesOh yeah we slow hands
Killer, for hire you know not yourself
We spies
We slow hands
You put the weights all around yourself
We spiesOh yeah we slow hands
We retire like nobody else
We spies
Intimate slow hands killer
For hire you know not yourself
We spiesIntimate slow hands
You let the face slap around herself
"Slow Hands"
Yeah but nobody searches
Nobody cares somehow
When the loving that you've wasted
Comes raining from a hapless cloud
And I might stop and look upon your face
Disappear in the sweet, sweet gaze
See the living that surrounds me
Dissipate in a violet place
Can't you see what you've done to my heart and soul?
This is a wasteland now
We spies
We slow hands
Put the weights all around yourself
We spies
Oh yeah we slow hands
You put the weights all around yourself now
I submit my incentive is romance
I watched the pole dance of the stars
We rejoice because the hurting is so painless
From the distance of passing cars
But I am married to your charms & grace
I just go crazy like the good old days
You make me want to pick up a guitar
And celebrate the myriad ways that I love you
Can you see what you've done to my heart and soul?
This is a wasteland now
We spies
Yeah we slow hands
You put the weights all around yourself
We spiesOh yeah we slow hands
Killer, for hire you know not yourself
We spies
We slow hands
You put the weights all around yourself
We spiesOh yeah we slow hands
We retire like nobody else
We spies
Intimate slow hands killer
For hire you know not yourself
We spiesIntimate slow hands
You let the face slap around herself
Monday, 31 December 2007
A long December, a short path in comparison
We make conscious choices in everything we do in life. Sometimes we contemplate our actions and give it more thought than necessary which in turn leads to complication.
Most things are not rocket science and do not require the logic of a nuclear scientist to figure out as they are plain as it is. What you see is what things are and the more you see the more you learn.
If life was not simple, the population of the world would only be a fifth of its current count as most will die from over-analyzing-stress-inducing-cardiac-deconstructing disease.
We act out of kindness, love and care because we simply are good. We curse, condemn & hate because we are no different from other living creatures.
There is no complex calculus involved in any of these, we know, but yet we try to think there is. Simplicity is so apparent that we force ourselves to think there is more then meets the eye.
When in fact, all that meets the eye is in fact all there is that meets the eye. So as the year draws to a close, I ponder upon the last 12 months and try to look at things as it is and spot the times when embracing simplicity would’ve makes things a little more colourful.
Next year, as I grow a little older (unfortunately this is mandatory), I will make sure simplicity prevails and live a little more.
p.s:
The list of things I would love to do in 2008 (this list is not exhaustive):
- Read more and practice writing to improve my literally skills.
- Play the guitar more and learn music with renewed vigour.
- Compose even more and record all existing materials.
- Intensify my fitness regime (it is time to get myself in tip top condition)
- Travel and have proper holidays.
- Spend a little less, save the rest.
- Listen all the time, speak only when required.
- Spend more time with my parents and make them good times.
- Keep coming up with great things to do through out the year
Most things are not rocket science and do not require the logic of a nuclear scientist to figure out as they are plain as it is. What you see is what things are and the more you see the more you learn.
If life was not simple, the population of the world would only be a fifth of its current count as most will die from over-analyzing-stress-inducing-cardiac-deconstructing disease.
We act out of kindness, love and care because we simply are good. We curse, condemn & hate because we are no different from other living creatures.
There is no complex calculus involved in any of these, we know, but yet we try to think there is. Simplicity is so apparent that we force ourselves to think there is more then meets the eye.
When in fact, all that meets the eye is in fact all there is that meets the eye. So as the year draws to a close, I ponder upon the last 12 months and try to look at things as it is and spot the times when embracing simplicity would’ve makes things a little more colourful.
Next year, as I grow a little older (unfortunately this is mandatory), I will make sure simplicity prevails and live a little more.
p.s:
The list of things I would love to do in 2008 (this list is not exhaustive):
- Read more and practice writing to improve my literally skills.
- Play the guitar more and learn music with renewed vigour.
- Compose even more and record all existing materials.
- Intensify my fitness regime (it is time to get myself in tip top condition)
- Travel and have proper holidays.
- Spend a little less, save the rest.
- Listen all the time, speak only when required.
- Spend more time with my parents and make them good times.
- Keep coming up with great things to do through out the year
Wednesday, 19 December 2007
Tupai
I saw a squirrel in the office today : D
How I wish I was a squirrel. Running round freely oblivious to its surrounding. Free of thoughts and worries. Only bothered about gathering nuts…..
I decided there and then to have some fun and role played as a squirrel.
Each time I had a thought process going, I asked myself ‘What would a squirrel do?’ Errrr, unfortunately the only I answer I came up with each time is ‘Gather nuts’
Who would’ve thought being a squirrel would be so difficult.
How I wish I was a squirrel. Running round freely oblivious to its surrounding. Free of thoughts and worries. Only bothered about gathering nuts…..
I decided there and then to have some fun and role played as a squirrel.
Each time I had a thought process going, I asked myself ‘What would a squirrel do?’ Errrr, unfortunately the only I answer I came up with each time is ‘Gather nuts’
Who would’ve thought being a squirrel would be so difficult.
Tuesday, 18 December 2007
Slow Cow Is I
If i miss the train again, I have none to blame but my silly self!
Good lord, my cynical self is already laughing at my own silliness. Unbelievable behaviour for a grown man!!!
Knock yourself on the head lah you lembu lembap!!!
Whoeee, that felt nice : D. A little self insult always clears my anxiety!!!
Good lord, my cynical self is already laughing at my own silliness. Unbelievable behaviour for a grown man!!!
Knock yourself on the head lah you lembu lembap!!!
Whoeee, that felt nice : D. A little self insult always clears my anxiety!!!
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